I have a client with a headache. This isn’t just an ordinary headache. It’s not even just a migraine. This is a permanent headache that has lasted seven months and may well last the rest of her life. She has been to doctors, alternative healers, Traditional Chinese Medicine practitioners… You name it, she can tell you her experience of the treatment about the hope, the raised interest, the disappointment. The fact is, her headache has stayed, and no-one has the foggiest idea what to do about it.

How do you begin to work with someone in this predicament as a coach? Many coaches like me will advertise their work as being able to help you make your dreams come true. We structure our lives under the knowledge that if it is humanly possible, together we can make it happen. We have more stories than we can count of people who said they couldn’t do it, believed they couldn’t do it, had PROOF they couldn’t do it. After a few weeks of coaching we receive beaming photos and overwhelming feedback in gratitude for helping them to see that not only is it possible to achieve our dreams, if only we get out of the way of ourselves it is even likely we will achieve them.

And yet here is something that seems truly insurmountable. A coach has no magic wand and understanding the limitations of your coach is crucial in any process. I have to say it took me a long time to accept the reality that this may not be something I could help her with. But I knew there was something I could do and that was to focus on something other than […]